Op-Ed: You Can't Joke About Communism Because It Killed 100 Million People and 100 Is Not a Funny Number The Way 69 Is

100 million lives. 69. 100 million lives: lost to brutally violent Communist regimes. 69: A number that represents visually two people performing simultaneous oral sex on each other. Do you see the difference? One of these is serious—deathly serious. The other one is a symbol of two people aligned such ...

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Yale Student Emits Ear-Splitting Scream After Finally Figuring Out What “Yuck Fale” Means

A piercing scream reverberated around the Yale Bowl this afternoon as a Yale student finally realized the meaning of the many “Yuck Fale” t-shirts sported by Harvard students around him ...

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Op-Ed: Adopted Kids Should Not Get Legacy Status

By Our Dads

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Harvard Fencing Team Disbands After Learning About Guns

"Aw, shoot."

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Freshman “Doesn't Even Fucking Remember Last Night”

Local student Jacob P. Root returned to his room in Canaday D yesterday morning—battered and bruised—after a night he “doesn’t even fucking remember.” Root, the most likely of his ...

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OP-ED: How The Bee-Delphic Merger Taught Me To Appreciate My Parents’ Arranged Marriage

In 1988, Uncle Nikhil introduced my dad and mom and declared it love at first sight. Ten days later, my dad married mom, and a few hours later, learned her ...

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Old Statistics Professor Tells Students That Back In His Day, Excel Only Had One Cell And They Should Be Lucky For The Number of Cells They Have Now
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Old Statistics Professor Tells Students That Back In His Day, Excel Only Had One Cell And They Should Be Lucky For The Number of Cells They Have Now

Harvard Math Department Announces Annual List of Fifteen Most Fifteen Fifteens
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Harvard Math Department Announces Annual List of Fifteen Most Fifteen Fifteens

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Women Excited To Be Part Of Incomprehensible, Idiotic Cross-Dressing Song- and-Dance Routine

Khurana Challenges Student to Spikeball Game, Destroyed 423-3
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Khurana Challenges Student to Spikeball Game, Destroyed 423-3

I Support Harvard Admissions: I Also Have a Yearly Asian Cap for Myself

The latest case against affirmative action has put Harvard in an unpleasant spotlight, with Students for Fair Admissions suing the university for capping the number of high-achieving Asian-Americans in favor ...

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Dean Khurana Renames Each Student One Word From His Screenplay, Institutes Mandatory School-Wide Roll Call

It's so good.

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Primitive Navigation Professor Likes to Think That the Students Teach Him; Is Absolutely, Unequivocally Wrong

Primitive Navigation professor John Huth is renowned throughout the college for thinking that his students teach him just as much as he teaches them. Recent reports have shown that this ...

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